Guys Index

Most guys are turned down for one of two reasons. The first reason we can't change because it is most often based on physical reasons. The second reason is simple, we aren't displaying any type of cool confidence. Women don't want to get the feeling that they are going to end up having to "take care of" you. Some women like to be taken care and others like taking care of themselves, but they don't need to become saddled with one more responsibility. The more they get the sense that you don't come with heavy baggage (or at least that you can carry it yourself) the less likely they are to engage with you.

Cool confidence often comes across quietly but steadily. In fact, those "strong, silent types" often end up attracting more women than they could possibly entertain. So what gives? Simple. Men need to be able to put down their baggage and move forward in a manner that not only feels strong, but looks strong on the outside as well.

Whatever you think you know about being "cool" you probably don't. Whatever you think you know about being cool around women, you probably don't. Women don't like show offs, excessive self righteousness and anger, or the sense that a man feels that he is superior to a woman. But they generally do like to know that a man can take care of his own needs, learn to walk with his head up and his footing firm, and can bring strength to a relationship.

Confidence is quiet, cocky is loud. Because cool confidence is quiet and calm, a man who is out and about shouting his own praises is more of a turn off than a turn on. Live like you mean it and do it quietly and no kidding, they really will come.

What about those times when you aren't feeling so confident? After all, no one feels really confident all the time, but you don't want to let them "see you sweat." There was a reason the grown ups read us The Little Engine that Could when we were kids. Using our own thoughts, we can actually boost our own level of confidence and at the very least, talk ourselves through the process with the illusion of confidence. Once we have completed our moment, we can then include our own evidence in our thoughts and create more confidence. It's a pretty neat trick because not only does it help you get through with the appearance of confidence, it helps to create more genuine confidence as well. And to most women, genuine confidence is very appealing.

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Terry Leslie is a successful and world renowned authority figure on creating and maintaining successful relationships. A much sought after global speaker in the areas of intimate relationships, self-improvement and human peak potential training.